tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-34133250103702576172024-03-05T02:13:18.980-08:00Where Hip Hop Meets ScriptureIn dedication to creativity, self-expression, music and enlightenmentUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger21125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3413325010370257617.post-31194397227019856562013-10-28T18:05:00.000-07:002013-10-28T18:05:41.875-07:00Chapter #8 Verse 2: Remembering Love in the Now<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhN5o2OVFON6jSd4LEX9ZCxAI4uhlh3gQJVCbkWG3c762dVX7TSVCbEs-8oyuqlbiM7WDL4ynqiNh5OsmtH8dPez939bBjvOW0oB0vmarKhfRuz7TW12k2s-agYXS8tWZDGmQTGTdkbmvs/s1600/IMG_1340.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhN5o2OVFON6jSd4LEX9ZCxAI4uhlh3gQJVCbkWG3c762dVX7TSVCbEs-8oyuqlbiM7WDL4ynqiNh5OsmtH8dPez939bBjvOW0oB0vmarKhfRuz7TW12k2s-agYXS8tWZDGmQTGTdkbmvs/s320/IMG_1340.JPG" width="320" /></a>In days of my recent, never-ending self-reflection, I'm challenged with remembering my perfection in a world of imperfections. The perfect paradigm is that in true reality there is no such thing. On my walk through Venice today, my small still voice whispered loudly enough for me to take note as I questioned God about my current path and my future co-creations. Constant reminders to "be in the now" and "stay fully present" have been my angels' messages as of late but I still find myself in a mental and emotional battle with worry, fear and stress. Knowing that all of these emotions are choices, the will power needed to break these lame habits is much more than I could have imagined. I'm loaded up with every spiritual tool you can name, my intellectual self is clear that happiness, abundance, co-creation, power etc are all things of choice but I still find myself weakened by the dark pull of worry. Brief moments of light find its way to my consciousness. I feel invincible and empowered knowing in my bones that I am clear and I know what I'm doing. My self-confidence is solid and nothing can shake it. Exhale. Moments later, my mind drifts back to the past, consumed by perceived failures and wrong choices which then brings me to the present moment that now becomes only a spring board to that eery future of tomorrow that looks bleak and reminiscent of events past. How can I break this cycle which I see so clearly but seemly have lost control?<br />
<br />
My still small voice gently reminded me that right now I only need to go within and remember the love that I AM. Even if it's fleeting, keep going back to that place no matter how ma<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgF5AbuGApeH9YosnoabNKpZe9vnjfE4FjWEkWEredABOUI5p37m4z0YoGtLos5Z4KyDVD_5Od4YXSvfi-h5QjGN5IJpLZNNV-dtwmMVB-EuF8aZdeWmiO-4VVYpeVJ8Nu4eX2wOYaipn4/s1600/IMG_3679.PNG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgF5AbuGApeH9YosnoabNKpZe9vnjfE4FjWEkWEredABOUI5p37m4z0YoGtLos5Z4KyDVD_5Od4YXSvfi-h5QjGN5IJpLZNNV-dtwmMVB-EuF8aZdeWmiO-4VVYpeVJ8Nu4eX2wOYaipn4/s200/IMG_3679.PNG" width="196" /></a></div>
ny times it takes so that love can be fanned to grow brighter than the darkness. And with each push, with each effort to remember love over fear, love will remain as a constant. How did I forget to love myself? Did I ever really know how? As an empath, I'm really just discovering how much energy, beliefs and emotions I've been running on that are not authentically my own. To my surprise what I thought was me really wasn't my true self. Even after all these years of doing so much spiritual work, I get to this place in time to realize that my past 10 years of "undoing" was really on phase 1 of my process. Like peeling layers of an onion, I thought that I had gotten past so many of my fears only to find that I can only pause to catch my breath because there is more work to do. With this realization, the wisdom heard today finally made sense to me. As I am "peeling the onion" in my continuous evolution it is imperative that I love myself each step of the way and remember that I am perfect already in a world of duality that is set to make me think that I am imperfect. Mastery of self; mastering my emotions, my thoughts and my actions must be rooted in love. Otherwise, I don't think this ride will be much fun. I AM remembering love.<br />
<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3413325010370257617.post-64883411942743755572013-10-07T20:31:00.001-07:002013-10-18T16:46:08.901-07:00Chapter #8; Verse 1: Truly Where Hip Hop Meets Scripture, pt 1<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKM1koEjrMIJyK-irEyIQfAIa0QKIPx5vOGjQDyigZsD5hyphenhyphenEnv-oXN1y3ufSyht2AJBPGeHIlyZ5p4631GcXOyF_PlWp2kHnocsFD3kNY3IRc9bGQbE-oPwdKCVHwHvyN7-fJaueOKwtM/s1600/photo.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKM1koEjrMIJyK-irEyIQfAIa0QKIPx5vOGjQDyigZsD5hyphenhyphenEnv-oXN1y3ufSyht2AJBPGeHIlyZ5p4631GcXOyF_PlWp2kHnocsFD3kNY3IRc9bGQbE-oPwdKCVHwHvyN7-fJaueOKwtM/s400/photo.JPG" width="296" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Ms Hill - thank you.....</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
Where did the summer go? As always when I have gaps in my postings I always scratch my head when I realize how fast time moves. This is a special posting because yesterday is the day that my musical love, Ms Lauryn Hill was released from federal prison. Today is also the day that I officially become an artist manager (again) with a new client. Two things that I would have never thought would happen...Ms Hill in prison and me taking on the responsibilities of being a manager. The oldest cliche of "never say never" waves its flag nice and high.<br />
<br />
Just few short weeks after my last post, I decided to take training to become a Vedic Meditator. As I briefly wrote about my experience in my May post I thought I'd recap again- so good I had to write it twice. :) This version, a bit more candid.<br />
<br />
Thanks to my other BFF one fateful day in May, I reluctantly went to a free "open house" to hear about learning to meditate. After studying so many different healing modalities for so long and trying on different forms of meditation that never stuck, I had no intention that this open house would be any different. In my normal beach-casual flyness (hoodie, jeans, sneakers), I ventured 2 blocks away from my house to find a model standing in the reception area posing as the Vedic meditation teacher. As I looked past him while extending my hand to shake his, I was looking for the old, bearded Indian guy dressed in a monk's robe and wearing mala beads. When I finally brought my eyes back to his and he smiled gently with shiny eyes and said "Welcome, my name is Light are you here for the class?" As I shook his hand pleasantly confused I felt a loud crashing thud in my chest. It was so loud I was sure that the model/teacher, my BFF and the people filing in behind me heard it. I smiled, nodded my head yes and slowly heard my BFF start to chat it up with the teacher. CONFIRMED - the model was the teacher. As I signed my name in the guest book I put my heart neatly back in to my chest. I wasn't sure if it was his strikingly good looks or the light auric frequency that caught me so off guard but I was willing to accept that it was both. The lecture started and as the hour passed I knew that I needed to take the course. If this was the "thing" to cure my insomnia and bring me peace, I wanted to try it. I had been drinking wine and popping any kind of sleep aid to make me sleep and nothing was working. My past 4 years have been insane- as I have documented in a few of my fragmented posts here. <br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgz50NCtAhkuu0hmoXhQ3Nv84FzesG2rXzzkYKQmJQwkYV4BHBFF-61zJHO5sWG8MDbkH0grJcZuPSZOgN_SkVc33XzSawcaFIsZBJWONyO1y6Gzdui7AVmUa5w0Aq1NilxqYa__TYjTY4/s1600/photo+copy.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgz50NCtAhkuu0hmoXhQ3Nv84FzesG2rXzzkYKQmJQwkYV4BHBFF-61zJHO5sWG8MDbkH0grJcZuPSZOgN_SkVc33XzSawcaFIsZBJWONyO1y6Gzdui7AVmUa5w0Aq1NilxqYa__TYjTY4/s320/photo+copy.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Rt: My offering for initiation; <br />
Lt: My graduation meditation reminder string</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
I didn't take the class right then as I wanted to but waited until his next session which was in late June. I had just started a new corporate job and I felt I was finally on the right track with my life for the first time in a very long time. If all of the wonderful benefits of Vedic meditation were really true, life was about to awesome again. I had the best looking guru around, my fabulous new job was underway and a sound night's sleep was waiting for me. I made it through initiation in 4 days and now 100 days in, life couldn't be more different AGAIN. That great corporate gig was done in 90 days, my friendships have shifted yet again, my sensitivities are at an all time high, my blissful nights of sleep have now given way to partial nights of sleep and I'm managing a hip hop artist. The highs and lows in such a short amount of time surely would have made me crazy (er) but I do know that meditation has saved me. The art of surrender letting go and going with the flow are at the forefront of my life class once again.<br />
<br />
<i style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: blue;">For more info on my teacher Light Watkins: www.beginmeditating.com </span></i>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3413325010370257617.post-8126787990856544022013-06-06T21:26:00.003-07:002013-10-07T20:41:33.522-07:00Chapter #7:Verse 3- I Had To Fall On My Ass In Order to Stand In My PowerMy last entry I had mentioned how I was on a quest to retrain my brain about running. I've been on my exercise routine going on 6 weeks now and it has been such a chore to simply go running. I whimsically wrote about some subconscious high school track story that makes me hate running. Little did I know that <i>today</i> I was able to get to the core of that story. I decided to go a different route in an effort "spice up" my run. Just as I hit my stride about 1/2 mile in I tripped over an uneven break in the sidewalk! I stumbled cartoon-style for a couple of feet thinking that I had a small window of opportunity to catch my balance and not slam into the concrete. I was wrong. The over animated, arms flailing, head-first dive into the pavement happened in very slow motion. Just inches before I made contact, I turned to my right side in grand hopes that I would not smash my face and glasses. As I laid stretched out on the sidewalk like a dead fish, all I kept thinking was "IS THIS REALLY HAPPENING??!!" To add insult to injury, there was one lone biker on this big empty side street who witnessed the entire fiasco. He graciously peddled over to see about me and his kind voice was the only thing that silenced the screaming in my head. My Beats By Dre headphones flew off and landed in some sort of street water sludge, my Iphone suffered a small scrape on the hard case but my right hand, knee, elbow and hip were scarred and bloody. I gathered myself, wiped off my headphones and decided to walk the rest of the 2 mile route I had planned to run. I refused to turn around and go home right then but for a moment I just wanted to walk to the nearest bar on Main street and drink a couple of beers. While walking along the busy street of Abbot Kinney all I could think about was the ONE track meet that I totally ate shit when my back foot caught the tip of the hurdle I was trying to clear. I was so embarrassed. I slid on the gravel track like I was sliding into home base at a baseball game. Scarred, bloody and embarrassed I got off the track limping to the side lines where my daddy stood to collect and console me.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXuGyOsheraxh_KoFvjojAMnmMl2TTrTp8yNZOe2KVnmkqbOE94IwkmZoK7BUav2ME2Mt1zR42-7cl_U99AVlACojwRwJyghBsIsbU3GdTiqStTu4nw8_Rb57DHxhpDOe-d4RNjpPM7lY/s1600/photo.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXuGyOsheraxh_KoFvjojAMnmMl2TTrTp8yNZOe2KVnmkqbOE94IwkmZoK7BUav2ME2Mt1zR42-7cl_U99AVlACojwRwJyghBsIsbU3GdTiqStTu4nw8_Rb57DHxhpDOe-d4RNjpPM7lY/s320/photo.JPG" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">part 1 of 4 impact points; small but hurts like hell</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<br />
When I got home this evening I knew I had to get to the source of this "running thing." I sat down to meditate and with only just a few minutes in tears came streaming down my face. I realized that I ran track to please my dad. Who knew??!! I wasn't coordinated enough for basketball so I decided to run track to live up to some self-imposed perfect picture that I had to be some great student athlete for my father. My dad always cheered me on for every meet, helped me train in the off-season and was my biggest cheerleader my entire track meet life. I HATED track but never quit for fear of disappointing him. Then I started to have a series of flashes as a young girl doing things and participating in activities because my parents wanted me to and 9 out of 10 was nothing I truly enjoyed. I loved animals, coloring and writing. Doing any of these activities made happy. At an early age I had a unique gift of being psychic which was very much ignored or discouraged. I found solace in animals, coloring and writing. Piano lessons, softball, church plays and the like were all things I was signed up for half -heartedly. I believe all they did came from a place of love with the intention of exposing me to things they did not have themselves growing up. Somewhere along the way, I lost my own voice and I never once rebelled against or said no to anything my parents wanted me to do. So much of my life lessons these past couple of months have been about boundaries and standing in my own power in every area of my life. I've had very strong, boundary-setting conversations with my mother, father and sister lately as well as establishing new boundaries with friends. In an effort to be on purpose I realized that my gifts and talents that I have to offer are only two pieces of life's puzzle. Being clear, being honest, speaking up for myself, honoring my feelings and being integrity with my choices creates the foundation for me to share my gifts and talents.<br />
<br />
Hip throbbing and hand still bleeding, I am so thankful for my fall today. I would have never guessed I'd be here writing about this kind of epiphany but I'm glad to finally free myself of a very old story that no longer serves me. <br />
<br />
<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3413325010370257617.post-58765245550306225742013-06-02T00:55:00.002-07:002013-10-07T20:42:23.778-07:00Chapter #7: Verse 2- The Art of Letting Go & Moving ForwardI just spent 45 minutes typing this entry only for it to get caught in the technology matrix and erase the entire copy when I clicked the publish button. The art of letting go never seemed more appropriate than now as I am trying to let go of being thoroughly pissed off that my simple masterpiece just got erased. How does one recreate genius? I need a pop tart and DJ Jazzy Jeff's house mix. Ok here's my attempt to...<br />
<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="clear: left; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNlhagHsCgL0RRR9LkjXG7iE_JFqJjbjDz-JSG5ZfId6xxlYXXlftruZ-DNrv-iEXwyBgoyuXl4DEAoWzOvwzUlgajyxHE8lQfnMOV0AoJc9Ve8xyEecBXUlBWRpOe34mf1tItz8R1_K4/s1600/photo.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNlhagHsCgL0RRR9LkjXG7iE_JFqJjbjDz-JSG5ZfId6xxlYXXlftruZ-DNrv-iEXwyBgoyuXl4DEAoWzOvwzUlgajyxHE8lQfnMOV0AoJc9Ve8xyEecBXUlBWRpOe34mf1tItz8R1_K4/s200/photo.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">raw juicing- drink it in, it is good! </td></tr>
</tbody></table>
It's day #10 of my 40 day detox. In partnership with my 2 best friends we all agreed no drinking or drugging for 30 days. Rikki initiated the initial challenge, Malcolm up'd his to 35 days and with lighting quickness the number 40 fell out of my mouth. I recall two thoughts popping in my head simultaneously; I don't drink that much, 40 days should be <i>"nothing" </i>and why not 40- in the Bible major things seemed to have always happened in, within or at the end of 40 days. The catch is not just eliminating alcohol and recreational drugs but ALL liquids that are not water or fresh juice. Even with this rule, I was still thinking it would be easy because I'm not an over-indulger in alcohol or drugs. <b>My day 10 confession;</b> I love beer, I really enjoy a great red wine and my daily morning ritual of my vanilla nut coffee with pumpkin spice creamer is just a necessary tool of happiness survival. I had no idea that my self awareness would be fine-tuned so quickly. What the hell is going on! Do I want it simply because it's no longer a choice? The mind is deliciously awesome and evil. <br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgT5RLP-Nf7VusvOJcmtb6nEcCvkn32TAUds7ROUK0EP_35vXRW4jBKiGnuviJMNkN8C-nttFPI7RDZ1124gTJFp5dgAkgIJLTcYXXqBsspvSGe_37NkI7V87reILGhtn3HiwoSHDTvC88/s1600/photorunning.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgT5RLP-Nf7VusvOJcmtb6nEcCvkn32TAUds7ROUK0EP_35vXRW4jBKiGnuviJMNkN8C-nttFPI7RDZ1124gTJFp5dgAkgIJLTcYXXqBsspvSGe_37NkI7V87reILGhtn3HiwoSHDTvC88/s200/photorunning.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Beats, sneakers & alot of sweat....</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
I also must mention that I'm 5 weeks in on my fitness regime. I made the commitment to get my ass in gear and stay on a daily exercise routine. Many moons ago I used to run track. Somewhere in my traumatized track training I told myself that I hate running. That old story plays like a broken record even today. Just a few days ago both wisdom and maturity showed up and told me that I needed to let go of that old story and rewrite a new one. Here's the new story: <i>"I LOVE running! I am so grateful that I am so healthy that I can run freely at anytime I choose. I'm 42 years old and I am still mistaken for years younger than I am. I love compliments. I want to make sure I still keep doing everything I can to keep myself healthy and fit and looking years younger than I am. Plus, I like occasionally getting carded when I buy beer, yet another compliment :). I have the beach and the Pacific ocean as my backdrop! There is nothing better than running everyday filling my body and lungs with ocean air."</i><br />
<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikfcs0swDpsYAsEZB9V5HLP5mcs6bPUMdbfuY1dn7mxaDWLcyUTceZItR1VLXn_P4BX8h0wR2llETf_U30WDQcCVrQmUpaCdTTRC7sY9AbWd-BY_mlWeRS_wV9lt8FGv98qzaIGLMo7vQ/s1600/photo+2.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikfcs0swDpsYAsEZB9V5HLP5mcs6bPUMdbfuY1dn7mxaDWLcyUTceZItR1VLXn_P4BX8h0wR2llETf_U30WDQcCVrQmUpaCdTTRC7sY9AbWd-BY_mlWeRS_wV9lt8FGv98qzaIGLMo7vQ/s200/photo+2.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">"evil is necessary" - <i>Eddie Murphy in Vampire in Brooklyn</i></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
The Universe's humor goes like this; as I was running towards the Palisades I run past the Hot Dog on a Stick stand (those damn turkey corn dogs) and this wonderful sign outside of a "watering hole." I immediately wanted to stop, have a cold beer, some hand-cut french fries and then turn around and walk home. I didn't succumb to my momentary weakness but I did stop long enough to take this picture and text it to Malcolm with caption, "Damn it! What day is this?" <br />
<br />
<br />
I am growing spiritually by leaps and bounds everyday. As long as I am Earth-bound, I know that in order to keep up with my next wave of spiritual growth my body has to be ready to hold and maintain this new onslaught of energy. Old ways of doing things, out-dated limiting mind recordings and simply all things that no longer serve me must be let go completely. No more excuses because my higher self awaits me. I will not allow for anything less than great. I'm glad that I finally caught up to the grander vision <i>(wwheeewww)</i>. Maybe now I can move through all of this resistance a bit more effortlessly and allow myself to receive <b>all</b> of the great that is waiting for me. <br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfv2d259vo7GO0fnoFaCoNi3-FOyDJ7BDkcUg_3VSaPeeWJFds7ir-2YCO6cgqZJRjs08aIFef-4kMyinwneaFlOWZlD6sYfpNm06K3Jy5UAqVaQRqfVUCiP6qkE0n2UAVqVXFBHwTaGQ/s1600/photo+1.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfv2d259vo7GO0fnoFaCoNi3-FOyDJ7BDkcUg_3VSaPeeWJFds7ir-2YCO6cgqZJRjs08aIFef-4kMyinwneaFlOWZlD6sYfpNm06K3Jy5UAqVaQRqfVUCiP6qkE0n2UAVqVXFBHwTaGQ/s200/photo+1.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">vanilla nut coffee traded in for organic green tea</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3413325010370257617.post-55532377107591887552013-05-13T14:50:00.001-07:002013-10-07T20:51:37.029-07:00Chapter 7: Verse #1 -LOVE<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGZvyKthekwpeti5nc_XsLbl8DqL8UaGtrEVcr7kbibnOynY1XFMfV9oG9b7ei2lpcDulYzgvfns1wcXUmnj3MH6ima2CAGsXvpXvf0jEQIF5pnpISZ2_VQXwQLY2Wma_aFd2mIIevK3U/s1600/IMG_0898.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGZvyKthekwpeti5nc_XsLbl8DqL8UaGtrEVcr7kbibnOynY1XFMfV9oG9b7ei2lpcDulYzgvfns1wcXUmnj3MH6ima2CAGsXvpXvf0jEQIF5pnpISZ2_VQXwQLY2Wma_aFd2mIIevK3U/s1600/IMG_0898.JPG" /></a></div>
LOVE: I sit at my computer this beautiful spring afternoon contemplating on what to write. LOVE popped in my head and a warm enlarging feeling expanded my heart space. As always with my writing endeavors, my entries are few and far between. Life has brought in a wave of lessons learned, house cleaning (physical and spiritual), old friends leaving, new adventures happening and finally my heart has opened to love.<br />
<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnrj7R2Wm-Aau7KpPnl2dtc2cBfWgxreMmFZMCCTsvwoe_0f8xapMnedoU1M05N-wwLAmrWiBtAMoHqNuyEuOwfRThSQgqWJogQ-tdbaganEKlGA2DWdoXQxhFEZtSZokOayFgq9efVgk/s1600/IMG_3144.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnrj7R2Wm-Aau7KpPnl2dtc2cBfWgxreMmFZMCCTsvwoe_0f8xapMnedoU1M05N-wwLAmrWiBtAMoHqNuyEuOwfRThSQgqWJogQ-tdbaganEKlGA2DWdoXQxhFEZtSZokOayFgq9efVgk/s320/IMG_3144.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Me & my 2 best friends & the loves of my life</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
The breaking of the old was sad for me. People that I have known since my young adult years that I considered the closest to my heart, left me with shocking disappointment and sorrow. At the exact same exact time old friends, loved ones I consider my soul mates reappeared in my life. Love showed up and I'm so glad that I was available to receive it. Self love made its debut as well. I <i>finally</i> decided to honor myself and never accept work out of desperation for money. It made for a very shitty experience and I felt undervalued and my own self respect was undermined at my own hands. I've spent the last 10 weeks in total self care and I no longer feel guilty for nurturing my own soul. Exhale. <br />
<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgRc21T9Gn27I1b1VfXtLL7bPxhWWFqDc9l8zOOS-uOfkbKwJeshPDEhC5NKNu5WWIeyav_48DHGYsGB0JBnrZ4iHUJRbigiYtzqoUIwGUXADbFlQaHt246-0cGANGB3CUKJ3RXdhaDHJg/s1600/IMG_0917.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgRc21T9Gn27I1b1VfXtLL7bPxhWWFqDc9l8zOOS-uOfkbKwJeshPDEhC5NKNu5WWIeyav_48DHGYsGB0JBnrZ4iHUJRbigiYtzqoUIwGUXADbFlQaHt246-0cGANGB3CUKJ3RXdhaDHJg/s200/IMG_0917.JPG" width="150" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Magic Light Sky show</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
One week ago, my best friend ( the tall one) took me to an intro to meditation class. I admit I was slightly hesitant only because I - the one called MEGA - already knew how to meditate. I do it all the time; at least so I thought. The irony of this statement really starts as I reference a personal journal entry I made earlier that day ( 5/5) asking my angels and guides to send me a new teacher, one for yoga. But also the request extended to asking for help to get my mind centered and peaceful, allowing more joy to be my everyday experience as opposed to fleeting moments as of late. Mal and I walked two short blocks down from my place to the Shiatsu message school. He smiled, I smiled. I shook his hand and my heart suddenly expanded and was accompanied by a wave of warmness that washed through me. In that fraction of a moment, time felt as if it stood still "Wow he is powerful," was my first thought, once I recovered from the movie- like moment of paused time. Let's fast forward to the gentle energy he illuminated, the flash of the dimples, beautiful inviting smile and his model shaped body. He was nothing like the robe shrouded, large bellied Vedic instructor I had preconceived on my walk to the venue. His lecture lasted about an hour and fifteen minutes. I hung on to every word. Needless to say, my guides answered my prayers within hours! I found my new teacher. I look forward to starting class next month. It's exactly what I need. Let there be Light :) <br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhU-YEUjGqA8B7N3c7S-1-znwMUuYM7apyWzJpG8AlPa3KK7Z1mS_v1TVJlGu1yvV6PpyHu9rAmBbW7uq6kVy6QifN9VXaYGre8yMBKJdTwyYwA_ot1YL_uRw1mgILtAHFx4hYr4maeEL0/s1600/IMG_3199.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhU-YEUjGqA8B7N3c7S-1-znwMUuYM7apyWzJpG8AlPa3KK7Z1mS_v1TVJlGu1yvV6PpyHu9rAmBbW7uq6kVy6QifN9VXaYGre8yMBKJdTwyYwA_ot1YL_uRw1mgILtAHFx4hYr4maeEL0/s320/IMG_3199.jpg" width="239" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Prayers facing the Sun for my sister</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
Lastly, love and healing between me and my sister Lisa took place over these last 4 days. Lisa and I have been estranged for two years. Its been a very challenging and sorrow-filled journey with her almost our entire lives. The past four years have been the most difficult and it wasn't until recently that I found my compassion and was able to see her life through her eyes. That moment started my healing process with her. Friday, May 10th she was admitted into the hospital with excruciating pain in her neck and shoulders. Things escalated over the weekend and she is now touch and go. I don't know if my sister will pull through this or not. Silently, in meditation I was able to connect with her spirit and for the first time ever we healed our relationship. My closeted gifts as a medium and empath came in handy since my sister is physically 3000 miles away from me. My greatest teacher on love and forgiveness is my big sister Lisa and I am so very, very grateful. <br />
<br />
LOVE, that's all there really is. Ancient and modern mystics alike all have the same simple message. I choose with all my heart to BE LOVE that I was created to be. Now let's see how this all plays out. <br />
<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3413325010370257617.post-55690588123744851822012-10-31T22:43:00.003-07:002012-10-31T22:45:50.539-07:00When You Learn, Teach...When You Get,GiveI just had the privilege of seeing a sneak preview of the video package shot on Dr. Maya Angelou for the upcoming BET Honors show. My best friend is a producer for the show and at Christmas she shared with me her extraordinary time she spent with Dr. Angelou in her home creating this segment. Rikki definetly has the art of storytelling in her blood. I felt as if I was there on location with her as she went in to exquisite detail about the crew, the beautiful home, the aura of Dr. Angelou and more. So to see the rough edit is just icing on the cake.<br />
<br />
The segment ended with a profound statement Dr Maya said her grandmother told her; "when you learn ...teach, when you get...give"<br />
<br />
* this was an older post that was sitting as a draft for months. Just decided to publish tonightUnknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3413325010370257617.post-88381868983013664342011-11-01T13:01:00.000-07:002011-11-14T13:21:26.925-08:00Chapter 6: Verse #2 - Stay Hungry....Stay FoolishStill amazes me how much times moves so quickly and yet at times seems to stand still. It's November 1, 2011 : 11/1/11- to some mystics considered a magical day. If this is true I sure could use some magic today. My last post was about the most magical night I believe I've ever had. Sadly enough, that was the last of my "big" fun. Before this turns into a brooding post on how stressed and crappy things are, I must acknowledge the things that I am grateful for.... EVERYTHING.<br />
<br />
<br />
In September my good friend in New York saw fit to send me a one way plane ticket to come out and explore the city once again and look for work. His hospitality was unexpected and so gracious I get a little teary eyed just thinking about it now. His awesome brownstone in Harlem afforded me the comforts of being around my people and historic sites like Langston Hughes home, the infamous Mosque No. 7 and classic restaurants. Even President Obama came to Harlem to eat at Red Rooster- which was right around the corner from where I was staying. Armed with my computer, an overweight suitcase, $100.00 and half enthusiastic attitude I arrived in New York a couple of days before the 10th anniversary of 9/11. I didn't tell my friends or family I was coming. I did my best to stay in the moment and try to have an open heart to have some fun and drop my bag of worries at the airport. I failed. 5 days into being there, I knew something was wrong. I was sick. I tried to masque it but sneaking off to the doctor in New York confirmed that I needed to get home, back to LA to address my illness. I stayed in New York for 3 weeks. I didn't let my host know I was sick- he was so excited to have me there and spent great efforts to convince me to move back to New York. I just didn't want to let him down or be a "downer. " I tried my best to keep my spirits high and get through the hustle of New York City energy. I did have fun getting to know my friend better, he's super cool and a Scorpio like me. I did see some friends, have a few meetings, couple of job interviews but it was very hard for me to stay energetic. Sprinkled with some great club nights; Q-tip dj'ing, Brooklyn Bowl with Questlove and all of my friends, there were a few days I felt like my old self. I missed her. I wish she would come back and stay longer.<br />
<br />
October seemed to have killed me but I'm still here- on November 1st seemingly to have weathered another storm. My body was slow to recover due to stress -mainly financial. I've sunk into a cave and I can't be social. My energy is so awful I can't imagine anyone wanting to be around me- especially when I don't even want to be in my own skin. Trying to heal my body and mind at the same time has proven to be challenging to say the least. But I guess I'm not different from any other human that is facing life challenges so I can't pretend that my story is somehow unique or deserves special attention. I just watched the Stanford commencement speech given by Steve Jobs again. It is 15 minutes of pure inspiration. I must note that Mr. Jobs just died of cancer a few weeks ago so there has been a lot of focus on his life story, genius and how he changed the world. Even now, I'm sitting here typing this blog on my MacBook Pro with my iphone next to it. He ended his speech quoting the final words of the editor of his favorite magazine, The Whole Earth Catalog. That quote was, "Stay Hungry, Stay Foolish." I don't know what made me play this video clip again today but I'm so happy I did. It was the perfect reminder for me to remember to follow my heart, don't settle for less and no matter what, do not let other people's loud voices drown out my own intuition.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHJUl3O7U8MtvXAof2bc-LYq0YoAo-U9FEdKhMjtjU_i-qgsB639qivXe7qjvb2zv3vZCE0dNKdo-7m_ZSRX3yp3MNgraUsnrXyxdXBhgdlNHtiwLHEpB2p7XQLWrcYgcWBvdDU7qzQnE/s1600/index.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="176" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHJUl3O7U8MtvXAof2bc-LYq0YoAo-U9FEdKhMjtjU_i-qgsB639qivXe7qjvb2zv3vZCE0dNKdo-7m_ZSRX3yp3MNgraUsnrXyxdXBhgdlNHtiwLHEpB2p7XQLWrcYgcWBvdDU7qzQnE/s320/index.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>I am desperately believing that I can finally leave the music business and open my cafe/bookstore. As I sit in these meetings/interviews I'm sick to my stomach thinking how uninterested I am in doing anything related to music. I think about how much I loved it and how I'm so proud of the work I've done over the last 15 years but now it just seems like that it was someone else's life. Not trying to sound over-dramatic but its the simplest way to describe how I feel. Switching careers, switching lives with no financial stability is terrifying. Just this morning, before I sat down to write I sent a proposal to a major music publishing company demonstrating how qualified I am for the open position. It felt completely counter-intuitive to what I want to do next but the pressures of financial burdens feel worse. I think they equally suck. I know I can do the job without question but what's in my heart is something completely different. How long do you wait for dreams to come true? Or do you just stay stuck on the hamster wheel until you fall off? Everyone should be able to do what they love. According to all of the "greats" it is the key to living fully. This philosophy <i>can't </i>be just for a select few. I guess today I'll continue to stay foolish.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3413325010370257617.post-40788431277352066102011-07-12T21:17:00.000-07:002011-12-30T22:56:50.987-08:00Chapter 6: Verse 1- Summer RainI'm always shocked at how quickly time flies. In a couple of days it would be almost 4 months since I last wrote. Spring has come and gone and seems like Summer Solstice was just yesterday. In reality, it's been almost a month since summer officially started. As I sit and reflect on past events to write about I come to a moment of clarity that time waits for no one. Last I wrote, I was lamenting over my then, current circumstances of having to jump back into the music business as I took on the task of working with Ms Lauryn Hill. Three weeks after my last entry, I flew to Hawaii to meet up with her and my "business partner"/ employer JB. Since I have to so much to say this time I'll keep the details of my trip short and sweet. After seeing 2 high energy performances in Hawaii, my meeting with her on my last day there went very well. JB gave me a very gracious introduction and she was so warm and kind. I met her beautiful children and I flew back home to LA on the red-eye. During my stay I had a very cleansing moment-most would classify it as a psychotic breakdown but I'll stick with healing moment for now. Hawaii is a magic place. A lot of spiritual people and healers believe there is healing in the water and ground and it certainly worked for me on day 2. It rained so hard as I cried uncontrollably for 3 hours. I couldn't figure out what was wrong but all I knew was I couldn't stop. I sat on my balcony in the rain and just cried. The rain stopped long before I was finished crying. Slowly but surely I snapped back to "me" and felt 1000% relieved. In retrospect, I think it was just time for a release. It had been months of stress and chaos and I would have never guessed that a trip I didn't want to take would be the best thing for me. God is funny like that.<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgP8LA6Ao69rcA75nLcI7vZwvxSGTOD9LyZMFaYOkQEHelS_9t0GJKsaJmRM-EN53N2vwYLmnRXGcAm3E_SzDOvb6LzXLjzgSLESsOhlDRBreSZkuQg9JVUPdHqvWgqOQeIFbDRSUfM6TA/s1600/IMG_1082.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgP8LA6Ao69rcA75nLcI7vZwvxSGTOD9LyZMFaYOkQEHelS_9t0GJKsaJmRM-EN53N2vwYLmnRXGcAm3E_SzDOvb6LzXLjzgSLESsOhlDRBreSZkuQg9JVUPdHqvWgqOQeIFbDRSUfM6TA/s200/IMG_1082.jpg" width="150" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Diamond Head Volcano, hotel balcony</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
The day of my return a very old friend reconnected with me - my friend Carl. He was in town recording for his new album and I was so very happy to see him. A few hours after landing, I was off to the studio. I had such a good time and I LOVED hearing and seeing him sing again. Even though I've seen him a handful of times over the past 15 years, this was the first time we hung out like we used to when we first met back in 1995. I so needed some fun and it was served up on a platter from the most unexpected source. April turns into May, Carl leaves and my saga with Prince starts.<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLAXyVbXnRQRkEvZgHIhPKrnX70kZKz9DDeb5Drt7boJ7fkYFxs3WhIylHsSGzPj4qcBpk4LrW2Rko3V4umjl3rRWbTCTZempXxyxAG0Q4DaRPJKAbEp7sD5Tlm2T0CCSTC_sPm8atUh0/s1600/IMG_1094.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLAXyVbXnRQRkEvZgHIhPKrnX70kZKz9DDeb5Drt7boJ7fkYFxs3WhIylHsSGzPj4qcBpk4LrW2Rko3V4umjl3rRWbTCTZempXxyxAG0Q4DaRPJKAbEp7sD5Tlm2T0CCSTC_sPm8atUh0/s200/IMG_1094.jpg" width="150" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Carl in the booth :)</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Short intermission- I do an event with my boy DJ Hapa at the Grammy Museum and I meet Chaka Khan who closes out the event by singing "I Feel For You" right in front of me. She was the coolest and the session teaching kids about the art of DJ'ing was inspiring. The History Of Hip Hop Exhibit was there and made my heart filled with such fun childhood memories.<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjTz4mWdJgqxwN5_BlF5f13YPdjgFwsdxjNIHom_BHn8_uijC91fTFhYumFBpJZeSu7sc-aDvYVEJW_0ovUmqJEwoLQzC4rRkXz4R93faLhrkRRJi_vmWaRKaj0M2VCHdx46u12Ze22kw/s1600/IMG_1124.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjTz4mWdJgqxwN5_BlF5f13YPdjgFwsdxjNIHom_BHn8_uijC91fTFhYumFBpJZeSu7sc-aDvYVEJW_0ovUmqJEwoLQzC4rRkXz4R93faLhrkRRJi_vmWaRKaj0M2VCHdx46u12Ze22kw/s200/IMG_1124.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Chaka Khan, DJ Hapa- "I Feel For You"</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<br />
My absolute most favorite person/artist/musician on the PLANET is Prince. Every since I was 9 years old he was "my guy." Prince was in LA playing 21 Nites at the Forum in Inglewood. This residency proved to be my ultimate fun and distraction for the month of May. My bestest girlfriend Ny, surprised with me with tickets and we had an amazing time. A week later, my dear friend MP so graciously hooked it up for me to buy tickets that were top choice seats for my many return trips thereafter. MP used to play with Prince, hence the choice seating. When he came to town he ended up sitting in on a few shows and to this day I can't tell you which show was better. They were all different and amazing each and every time. I felt like I was 14 all over again. One show was Stevie Wonder's birthday so I sat in amazement as I watched Prince, Stevie, Sheila E and MP on the stage at the same time. My moment of " how in the world did I end up right here right now?" stuck with me for most of that show. I was able to attend one of the more exclusive plays when Prince played 3 shows in one night at the HOB Hollywood. That night was the most spiritual, magical night of my entire life. I need a separate blog dedicated just for that night. It changed me and I am so grateful for it.<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5WL0vHzkXB3E-HDDREDHuFnlTpnZHWYcJ-yBDRP3V1FqfRW3ngChwZNze-FYFkXUTkhbQykAvOQzuTKFS_js1zuewmq0XGfFnnLaYp-VGsTWqPP5isK2u25zzXgoAySQkEzNpPOFF3rQ/s1600/IMG_1143.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5WL0vHzkXB3E-HDDREDHuFnlTpnZHWYcJ-yBDRP3V1FqfRW3ngChwZNze-FYFkXUTkhbQykAvOQzuTKFS_js1zuewmq0XGfFnnLaYp-VGsTWqPP5isK2u25zzXgoAySQkEzNpPOFF3rQ/s200/IMG_1143.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Magic Night at the HOB</td></tr>
</tbody></table>In conclusion, I realize nothing profound was written in this entry. The gist of it comes in the form of choppy reports of "catch up." But I can say that many ah-ha moments, clarity of heart, life lessons and resolutions were interwoven in these reported happenings. I swear, I hear my dad's voice in my head right now saying<br />
"just write babe, that's what you do." I find joy in writing and why I don't do it more is just silly. Stay tuned, verse 2 coming shortly.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3413325010370257617.post-31518946924325180062011-03-16T14:35:00.000-07:002011-12-30T22:53:27.393-08:00Chapter 5 Verse #1: After Winter Must Come Spring<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBBhVuRpRuxKYu5CEM61ufx7FDuBoGfOWu5thvlFjuUwd_IOrZUxcnnKxag-KxQ9pScJC5eq466AWwaqFkAAmEQNWsINdElQRFI1DmRJVGlVoBJMhojTa_rSusDvJpamyCPUYl0YM260I/s1600/images-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBBhVuRpRuxKYu5CEM61ufx7FDuBoGfOWu5thvlFjuUwd_IOrZUxcnnKxag-KxQ9pScJC5eq466AWwaqFkAAmEQNWsINdElQRFI1DmRJVGlVoBJMhojTa_rSusDvJpamyCPUYl0YM260I/s1600/images-1.jpg" /></a></div>Its been over a month since my last installment. No matter how much I say it or know it, time surely escapes me and I wonder how fast this year is going to fly by. As usual, so much has happened and changed since February 9th and all I can say now is that I'm happy that "official" Springtime is just a few days away. Spring Equinox is March 20th at 7:21pm EST. Living in Los Angeles doesn't really offer the change of seasons like it does for most of the other states, the changing of the seasons is so much more than just weather patterns for me.<br />
<br />
One week ago, Japan suffered a 9.0 magnitude earthquake which in turn created a 30 foot tsunami that took out much of the northeast region of the country. In wake of the disaster, the nuclear power plant in that region is now in chaos as a nuclear meltdown has occurred in all four reactors. Total disaster are the only words to describe what the world has witnessed. Last Thursday night in the early AM when I came home from a Pharoache Monch album listening party, was when I heard of the quake and tsunami. At 2:30am I watched CNN in horror as pictures and video showed the real-time destruction taking place. The quake was one of the largest recorded in decades and Hawaii and the entire west coast of the US was put on Tsunami alert. As I write, I have the most amazing view of the Pacific ocean which illustrates the irony of this blog. By 4am I'm in slight panic mode and decided that I'd rather be safe than sorry by heeding the warnings. I got a full tank of gas, pulled some cash from the ATM and came home to decide what to pack and put in my truck in case of an evacuation. My mind ran wild with a million disaster scenarios. Since the west coast sits on the "ring of fire" - the area that geologists call the quake zone, I thought if a 9.0 hit in Japan, the earth plates could shift over here just a easily, potentially causing the same destruction right here in Santa Monica. The realization hit me when I stood in the middle of my apartment trying to decide what was important in my life that could fit in my truck. After 45 minutes of scrambling for my lock-box of important documents, packing my computer and all the hard drives, lugging tubs of pictures down 2 flights of stairs, I looked around at all that would be left behind with great sadness. My lesson in attachment to things was very clear. And while I stood there in full awareness of this lesson, it didn't make the potential parting with these things any less hurtful. Flashes of Hurricane Katrina and Haiti victims came to mind. In that moment, I accepted what<i> could </i>be gone, held the memory of those things dear and finally I let go.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMTXZrXZ1cEqVlCKLMHr4sMQNMd32OFs83ERHfjIjW8oSLfWYHOT7_qJUCgQ4bgg71Nqi8Cgz12eubmxmu2b6N6fI6lpvhaY8I1mIJKZf0jO9ym24DN2bS3SeOm766sZ_X6-9NIInO5yA/s1600/images-4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMTXZrXZ1cEqVlCKLMHr4sMQNMd32OFs83ERHfjIjW8oSLfWYHOT7_qJUCgQ4bgg71Nqi8Cgz12eubmxmu2b6N6fI6lpvhaY8I1mIJKZf0jO9ym24DN2bS3SeOm766sZ_X6-9NIInO5yA/s1600/images-4.jpg" /></a></div><br />
8:30am comes- the arrival time the tsunami was to hit Santa Monica. By 9:30am, everything was still normal. The coast, looked as it did everyday. The news helicopters were steady in the air in front of my place as the blades created a haunting sound of doom. Mixed with the helicopters of LAPD and the Coast Guard, it sounded like a war zone outside of my window. As irony would have it, the day was so beautiful. Sunny, not a cloud in the sky and a gentle breeze flowed through my patio door screens. At this point I had been up for over 24 hours. I couldn't sleep and preparation to evacuate was still at the forefront of my mind. One amazing thing happened to me in one of my trips down to the carport at 4am. Right by my truck directly in front of the trunk hatch was a single white feather laying on the ground. Not necessarily unusual for feathers to be found at the beach but I just knew that this was no coincidence. I knew that is was a sign from my guardian angels that I was safe. Even though I continued to be prepared, a sense of peace came about that allowed me to detach from the media-induced fear and focus on praying for Japan.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div>This same day, I get a call from a colleague who is now managing Lauryn Hill. He asked me to join the team. After I hung up all I could do was just laugh because in the midst of chaos, life still continued for everyone else, including me. The laughing coming from a place of relief, irony and sleep deprivation. Now 5 years later since my first encounter working with her, I'm back at the door of Lauryn Hill. Even though this opportunity is different from before, I'm still here - with her. When I hung up the phone, "Everything is Everything" video came on VH1 Soul. I laughed out loud again thinking what a great sense of humor God has. With supreme reluctance, I finally accepted the opportunity. It's always scary to work with people you admire. I'm praying that WHATEVER it is in our karmic journey together gets resolved with love and peace as I strive to move onward to my vision of opening my cafe. I am such a fan and I don't want to loose my reverence for her as a musician in the process, as I have for so many others I've worked with throughout my career. Maybe this is a lesson in acceptance and non-judgment for me.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgudzPr1k_lPQghUNJLxCjKtVsmCBfpyXEggHpuW0nIUXhuT-4JmstzMygeeBDcL7E8wWRdyq_euKy1ntaeJa8ADFbXcQ0nGwn7uvd-tLda81_DnjqT5nlzLWkdwKni7Czzu_g2qKpAgiM/s1600/images-3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgudzPr1k_lPQghUNJLxCjKtVsmCBfpyXEggHpuW0nIUXhuT-4JmstzMygeeBDcL7E8wWRdyq_euKy1ntaeJa8ADFbXcQ0nGwn7uvd-tLda81_DnjqT5nlzLWkdwKni7Czzu_g2qKpAgiM/s1600/images-3.jpg" /></a></div><br />
<br />
So here I am. Winter is almost over. I've weathered the winter of my personal life and now I'm praying that spring will usher in the rebirth of all things new and great.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3413325010370257617.post-77631116942164073822011-02-09T14:33:00.000-08:002011-02-09T15:10:56.164-08:00Chapter 4; Verse 3: Rap Game Surprises Me AGAIN<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWotdKrJcvm6P1MwqS1ARI91CNuzhN6laWKbgiwxUvia4MeMduedCClk9tOc9hNRcPVoKcQ6GkuyHPRBc8lEFbioYCOwjzKdR5JFDXBQbVeU6X3y5YSuZWrm966BlgAVVtRQH4IOzO0fQ/s1600/wakaflockaflame4.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 167px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWotdKrJcvm6P1MwqS1ARI91CNuzhN6laWKbgiwxUvia4MeMduedCClk9tOc9hNRcPVoKcQ6GkuyHPRBc8lEFbioYCOwjzKdR5JFDXBQbVeU6X3y5YSuZWrm966BlgAVVtRQH4IOzO0fQ/s200/wakaflockaflame4.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5571827568682264482" /></a><br />Thanks to the wonderful folks of Ballerstatus.com I learned just yesterday that the rapper Waka Flocka has signed on to be the new spokesperson for PETA! I pause with a million question marks running through my mind as to how this unlikely paring came about. I must emphasize the word <span style="font-weight:bold;">unlikely</span> as directly related to my own judgmental perceptions I have of this guy. Honestly speaking, I'm not a fan of his music. What I've heard of his talents follows 95% of today's "dumbed-down" & minimal lyric-filled approach to hip hop music. This is why I refer to him as a rapper not an emcee. <br /><br />I admittedly have judged him as a rapper and quickly dismissed him as a musician simply because I do not feel inspired in any good way when I listen to his music. My judgments range from shallow, boring, ignorant and a pawn of the dark evil forces that decide what hip hop music should be popular. So to my absolute and TOTAL shock of the news that he has a cause that he is participating in, it nearly knocked me over with skeptical excitement. He's quoted, <span style="font-style:italic;">"Animals should be treated the same as you would a kid. Would you want someone just to walk up and skin your kid? Hell no!"</span> <br /><br />My very judgmental self kept me from full celebration of this event as I immediately thought; 'Does this guy really have a passion and concern for animals or did he get a fat paycheck to take some photos for the campaign?' I didn't say it was ok to think this way but <span style="font-style:italic;">I'm just sayin'!</span> Honesty is in full effect here. But even as I write this, I begin to think about all the other celebs that have signed on for PETA campaigns in the past and recent past. I'm not 100% convinced that Klhoe Kardashian was an animal lover prior to her campaign. She appears to be about as engaging as Waka's lyrics. <span style="font-weight:bold;">SO</span> who am I to judge? ABSOLUTELY nobody. If Waka's campaign can bring more awareness about the injustices taking place in slaughterhouses and mink farms to an audience that most likely could give a shit(again my ugly head of judgment stands up here), then ROCK ON! This gives me another opportunity to reassess my O.G. hip hop mind-state and embrace the latest evolution of a culture that I love so much. <br />WAKA FLOCKA FLAME- wow :)Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3413325010370257617.post-72468497092739989202011-02-07T12:56:00.000-08:002011-11-16T20:56:05.944-08:00Chapter 4; Verse 2: The Emergency of DJ Kool Herc<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOoHc6DzKWq7yXne1m1mJrW0qkwUI4IMxOei1fAn7csuYKxg_eDTCpgKqZErHUk1AO7WZ5ZKhGG_3UKCVSTsbDCU8nQB1IAngFJXeV9LSp6SWzOl0DcYwuKJyOfsngtr3qmADxzCboEvI/s1600/DJKoolHerc_01-30-2011.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5571077919441680258" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOoHc6DzKWq7yXne1m1mJrW0qkwUI4IMxOei1fAn7csuYKxg_eDTCpgKqZErHUk1AO7WZ5ZKhGG_3UKCVSTsbDCU8nQB1IAngFJXeV9LSp6SWzOl0DcYwuKJyOfsngtr3qmADxzCboEvI/s200/DJKoolHerc_01-30-2011.jpg" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; float: right; height: 200px; margin: 0 0 10px 10px; width: 200px;" /></a><br />
<br />
In the past couple of weeks, Hip Hop founder/Godfather/kick-starter/pioneer DJ Kool Herc made the hip hop news wire with regards to his health issues and financial quagmire. The man who is responsible for creating hip hop is in much need of an operation for his kidney and has amassed over $10,000 in health care bills. The hip hop community cried out in rage over this seemingly easy problem to solve. The social networks and websites were all a blaze demanding that it was the responsibility of the multi-millionaire hip hoppers to kick in what would be club money or jewelry money to take care of our architect of hip hop. I myself couldn't understand why the debate over raising money lasted as long as it did when the likes of Jay Z, Diddy, Russell, Kanye, Rick Ross, Will etc are all in a position that $10-$25K is money that they sneeze at. DJ Premier and Chuck D joined forces to do a benefit show and an upcoming album to create a fund for him. Countless consumers and lovers of the culture have poured in their dollar donations in reverence and consciousness to help the man who created the culture that we all love so much. <br />
<br />
Brilliant Kevin Powell wrote the most moving blog about this emergency. So much more eloquently said than I can ever hope to express, here is the link: <span style="font-weight: bold;">http://www.kevinpowell.net/blog/</span><br />
<br />
I read today that Russell Simmons has "stepped up" to help Kool Herc but I found one of his comments a bit disturbing. He is quoted, <span style="font-style: italic;">"We need real health care, that's for sure. As far as helping out, I'd like to help out young kids but I'm going to help out Kool Herc as well. Yeah, I'm going to be one of them and so will a lot of other Hip Hoppers. [We'll] bail him out but I don't think it's their job. I think it's the government's job to take care of people who can't afford health care.," <br />
</span><br />
I think we ALL understand that it's nobody's JOB to bail out anyone. You do what you do from the kindness of your heart. Now, I could be over-reacting but it really sits with me strangely that he said this. I'm going to assume this came from the reaction from the hip hop community that demanded that it is their (mulit-millionaire hip hop moguls) job to save him. If this quote is in reaction to that sentiment then it absolutely seems more palatable to digest. In such a case I would agree. It is nobody's job to do anything. BUT one would think as a natural progression of circumstances, that if you got it do it! This isn't some old no-name dude off the street. This is THE man who created a musical and cultural movement! This new music genre has thrived and it effects the lives of countless people around the world, including those that have cashed in brilliantly on it. <br />
<br />
This news also comes on the heels of today's hip hop headlines that Rick Ross just welcomed Wale to his label by gifting him a $44,000 black diamond Cartier watch. Absolutely not hating on that. Good for him. As Superbowl celebrations and label welcomings were happening yesterday, DJ Kool Herc is still asking to receive donations so that he can live. I'm not one to tell ANYBODY how to spend their money but there is just something inherently uneasy in my soul to know that this is the heart-state of those in our community. <br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIP43IKUHxf32Q9PKcJ06S8B0368bKlszgar9wsgHb6q5-L2HkGJhrUvit7WPeJGguR2DIihqFbCnaehRHy5BgK7zvLLJz5ahXNk6VXRlY-9e8BN3gfn9fy9MyxM5R889FWTcgEI4if_8/s1600/Kool+Herc_02-02-2011.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5571077611516223378" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIP43IKUHxf32Q9PKcJ06S8B0368bKlszgar9wsgHb6q5-L2HkGJhrUvit7WPeJGguR2DIihqFbCnaehRHy5BgK7zvLLJz5ahXNk6VXRlY-9e8BN3gfn9fy9MyxM5R889FWTcgEI4if_8/s200/Kool+Herc_02-02-2011.jpg" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 200px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 200px;" /></a><br />
This quote from Kool Herc is taken from his statements from HipHopDX.com.<br />
<br />
<span style="font-style: italic;">Following his release from the hospital Kool Herc has now taken to raising awareness of the many issues plaguing this country’s health care system. <br />
<br />
"We live in one of the superpowers of the world!" said Kool Herc in a statement to MTV News. "'Give me your tired, your poor ... ' and then you don't take care of them? There should be no weak ants in the colony. There shouldn't be anyone fighting for health care! This has been going on too damn long!”<br />
<br />
“Now we are fighting for health care not just for me, but for everyone,” said Herc. “I see this situation as another quest for me to shine light on a sensitive issue for the community. I'm an instrument of God. I'm here for a purpose and I want to be here for the solution."</span><br />
<br />
So as much as this is a Hip Hop emergency, it is also a HUMAN emergency as we as citizens in the United States are facing a health care reform crisis. I have struggled to pay for a breast cancer surgery when I had very limited health care. I have no savings left as a result of staggering health care bills and fell behind in payments to other creditors and now my debts have overwhelmed me. Yes, I'm college educated and worked for a small company that could not afford health care for their employees and had to pay for a policy on my own. Well, that minimum policy did just that; it gave me minimum relief from the mountain of costs it took to restore my health. I understand the stress and the frustration. I am dismayed by the insanity of those who still think in the "pull yourself up by your own bootstraps" mentality. Sometimes, people just need help. A wealthy society and government such as our own should not think twice as to providing health care for every citizen. Again, it just seems like the right thing to do. I applaud President Obama for going the distance to bring about reform but even as I write this his health care plan repeal hangs on judgment of Chief Justice ? which is terrifying. In the world of bullshit politics, I know more is at play than the simple idea of doing the right thing.<br />
<br />
I can only pray that one day soon Mother Earth and human life is valued more than money.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3413325010370257617.post-80368569404186565732011-02-01T12:55:00.000-08:002011-02-09T15:41:17.227-08:00Chapter 4; Verse 1- Revolution & The Power of Words<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGMAGuJpvLGIg7q7Lx0Cy3nZ_-aN3XBG1elghM5ONx4u25mnOzdYvaT-5nLLhRehq6aavauGmdmNA1ahrj-mSIYxfVDlTAu9-sPF7GcaoiXkrjqeScoAu09Dpjq1qa-H5BYewhU73nceI/s1600/201112616396346965_21.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 132px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGMAGuJpvLGIg7q7Lx0Cy3nZ_-aN3XBG1elghM5ONx4u25mnOzdYvaT-5nLLhRehq6aavauGmdmNA1ahrj-mSIYxfVDlTAu9-sPF7GcaoiXkrjqeScoAu09Dpjq1qa-H5BYewhU73nceI/s200/201112616396346965_21.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5568834257550604178" /></a><br /><br />I can't believe that the entire month of January flew by in the blink of an eye. There were many days that I sat at my computer with the intention to write but came up blank. So much has been going on with me personally and the world, at times it just felt overwhelming to pick a place to start. <br /><br />The past few weeks the Middle East has exploded again with civil unrest. Starting in Tunisia when a man set himself on fire in protest to the government regime. Tunisia-a small Islamic country kicked off a series of revolutions throughout the Middle East with Egypt at the forefront of all the world news headlines. I'm shamed to say that until the protests started I had no idea that Egyptians were so unhappy and oppressed by their current President, President Mubarak. I've known of him only from our own government's praises that Egypt has been a staunch ally to the US all of these years. It's been 30 years that he has been in power and I do remember as a little girl in 1979-1980 ( I was 10) when the Egyptian president Anwar Sadat was assassinated and Murbarak came to power. President Jimmy Carter was in office. <br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWnKWzS00qzRzMC9PriD1dLzwL6-dL6kiY_O61jSHj88wdYM3xEosWyJeEkK6k0jtDLvpbvn943AVmKZ_9VYEpCpW9ga1yZq2VSH0NmJ6Xn-BycPv3I7LpG40jqrTeVIMVcnbGSbx4cmA/s1600/201011239416160833_20.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 132px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWnKWzS00qzRzMC9PriD1dLzwL6-dL6kiY_O61jSHj88wdYM3xEosWyJeEkK6k0jtDLvpbvn943AVmKZ_9VYEpCpW9ga1yZq2VSH0NmJ6Xn-BycPv3I7LpG40jqrTeVIMVcnbGSbx4cmA/s200/201011239416160833_20.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5568834831989259538" /></a><br />The young people of Egypt took its cues from Tunisia and took to the streets in a united voice calling for the end of the corruption and brutality of Mubarak's regime. He is a stubborn and proud man and even as I write this he has not conceded to the people's wishes. I watched on Al Jezeera TV - stream on my computer, the peaceful protest that is happening now in the streets of Cairo. Over 2 million people have gathered and are in for the long haul until the president steps down. It is a very powerful sight to behold. <br /><br />In these recent events and even looking at the state of political turmoil and resentment happening here at home in the United States, I wonder if revolution will ever take place again here. The climate is heating up for one but I'm unsure if the citizens of the United States have reached their tipping point yet. Speaking with my daddy a few weeks ago, I was venting on my frustration of not finding a job since I've been unemployed for a year and half and the insane process of receiving unemployment benefits. Some republicans wanted to cut the benefits after the initial 6 month allotment but President Obama has extended it multiple times now. THANK GOD for it. Even though my earnings have gone from $1500 a week to $400 a week it is SOMETHING. The audacity of the wealthy saying that people will become dependent on government assistance is absurd to me. There is no way I can ever get used to maintaining a lifestyle that I worked hard to achieve to basically poverty level. At 40 years old, I'm considering going back to school to get my master's degree but hesitate only because I don't want to acquire more debt of student loans and still have nothing available to me at a decent wage when I'm done earning my degree. Feels very much like damned if I do and damned if I don't. The divide of the wealthy and the poor is growing fast here in America and once the divide collapses to the majority being poor, I firmly believe the revolution will be televised. It's exactly what the country was founded on (revolution) and it would be remiss of the government to not keep this in the forefront of their decision making and political agendas on Capitol Hill.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3413325010370257617.post-86506536296535543592011-01-04T11:28:00.000-08:002011-01-04T11:40:35.064-08:00Chapter #3;Verse 1 - New Year & Creating SpaceAs I read this article this morning I thought it was a great reminder for everyone. I don't know about you, but I've spent a lot of time clearing my space, energetically and physically most of 2010. There is so much that I want to do and experience and sometimes I feel like I'm going to bust if I can't get it all done- especially when these feelings are equated to "stuckness." I feel like I've been dragging around cement shoes and I'm ready to run and not stop. Creating joy and my life on purpose is my goal. In addition to that, I now allow myself to be open for all of the wonderful, serendipitous things to fall in line. So here is the article from Jennifer Hoffman who publishes her inspirational works at Urielheals.com;<br /><br /><span style="font-style:italic;">Create Space for your Intention<br /> <br />Every new year begins with resolutions to be better, smarter, more successful and happier. And this generally lasts for a little while then we step into our old ways and the new year can become a repetition of the previous one. What happened? We set out with good intentions and yet nothing changed. There is a very subtle understanding that will help you create resolutions that you will be able to keep and see the results you want in your life, and it has to do with how you set your intention. <br /> <br />We make new year's resolutions at the end of the year, when we look at all of the things we didn't do, the things that didn't happen or all of the things that did not work out the way we wanted to. Our resolutions then become the focus for fixing our life. But there is nothing to fix because there is nothing wrong. Everything is always perfect and in divine order, in that moment. We can change anything we want to change when we do the one thing that will allow change to happen, which is shifting our thinking. Without that, nothing is ever going to change because it is the energy of our thoughts that creates the reality in which we live.<br /> <br />When we intend for something to happen an energetic vortex is created that begins to move energy towards our intention. This new energy vortex connects with everything that supports and is in alignment with it and clashes with everything that is not. We feel the alignments as supportive, positive events and the clashes as fear and resistance. And if we try to hold on to everything, we are going against the transformative energies of our intention and not allowing them to manifest. Then we feel stuck.<br /> <br />To create powerful, positive and lasting change we must start with the realization that everything in our life is perfect. Then we can allow the energy vortex to expand and as it does, it will attract what resonates with it and push out everything that doesn't. One thing we can learn is to gracefully release what is trying so hard to leave so we can invite its replacement. This flow of release and receiving is what allows our intentions to manifest. For this new year set your intention for what you wish to have in your life in this moment and be prepared to gracefully let go of whatever needs to leave so you can create space for your intention and allow miracles to unfold in an effortless flow that creates the fulfilling, powerful, joyful life that you dream of and can create, with the right intention.</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3413325010370257617.post-91661263932128475922010-12-21T13:01:00.000-08:002010-12-21T13:25:33.922-08:00Chapter 2 Verse #3-Lunar Eclipse & Winter Solstice<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqeRDb7dNTjHAd9DWluPMshCNSTLslSJFLcEcb7jkpZi10LlsxQU4gimmSS_CT06h5YWToj_Jp2V6rHu07JN-K9772bGkhEibi2YPau7aiBoy5wb5R3dKVmVkXd0Z_HsMGLXmCXpWfZKo/s1600/slideshow_1001998804_Total_Lunar_Eclipse.JPEG-02.JPG"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 138px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqeRDb7dNTjHAd9DWluPMshCNSTLslSJFLcEcb7jkpZi10LlsxQU4gimmSS_CT06h5YWToj_Jp2V6rHu07JN-K9772bGkhEibi2YPau7aiBoy5wb5R3dKVmVkXd0Z_HsMGLXmCXpWfZKo/s200/slideshow_1001998804_Total_Lunar_Eclipse.JPEG-02.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5553248350944926322" /></a><br /><br />Today in the early morning (1:32am PST) the world witnessed a total lunar eclipse on the winter solstice. This phenomenal event took place for the 1st time since 1638 and won't happen again until 2096. When I think about that date- I realize that I will not be alive here on Earth. My own mortality stares me right in the eye as I write this. But this is not a piece about mortality as much as it is about the true meaning of the life and death cycle. This is such a powerful energetic alignment and means so much for all of humanity. As a lightworker (yep said it out loud) we celebrate such an amazing event not only for the science of it but for the symbolic nature that it brings. This article from Suzanna Bowling of Times Square Daily explains it perfectly;<br /><span style="font-style:italic;"><br />"The winter solstice marks the first day of winter and the beginning of the return of the sun. The cold deepens; the days lengthen and hope is re-born. In a strange way, the 2012 that was foretold is tonight mathematically speaking. In Mayan Calendars we have always been two years ahead. If you think in terms of numerology, 12/21/2010 adds up to 3+ 3+ 3 = 9, which is the number related to psychic awareness, intuition, prophecy and inherent wisdom.<br /><br />The winters solstice that is happening tonight can be difficult externally for some, but also a powerful time for spiritual powers if we stay in our most positive highest energies! Meditate, pray, reflect!<br /><br />During this time insight and lessons will come to us. This is a time about passion and fighting for truth and integrity, to remove darkness and ignorance with courage and wisdom.<br /><br />Focus tonight on seeking a higher purpose in life. There is a lot of intensity, with Mercury retrograding. The reason the eclipse is so powerful is because everything is happening at the same moment in time. The sun (source of power, our soul) changes direction in the sky, the eclipse is extremely rare, the moon (the mind, emotional reflection of consciousness, intuition) the earth (the body, our physical presence) are all at once on the same plane! Body, mind and soul aligned at the same time! Earth, Moon and Sun -- aligned in the same trajectory. POWERFUL!"</span><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhSEGABKni_Kh9rQSi1z3hj9bFXgRRpXwa39Rm_28diYLIawmbOr3JtJuLvGIjQ8mVbeU-YzKewnjP6stfAMSyoqh89TaSkcACSCLU9fpKOu7Dfyhx5Uj7VgGobcGd0OYRBKIxZBOS6S0/s1600/506292main_dec20_eclipse_map-4x3_346-260.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhSEGABKni_Kh9rQSi1z3hj9bFXgRRpXwa39Rm_28diYLIawmbOr3JtJuLvGIjQ8mVbeU-YzKewnjP6stfAMSyoqh89TaSkcACSCLU9fpKOu7Dfyhx5Uj7VgGobcGd0OYRBKIxZBOS6S0/s200/506292main_dec20_eclipse_map-4x3_346-260.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5553248794346015618" /></a><br /><br />My wonderfully inspiring friend Denise sent a belated birthday note to me the other day stating that this is my "Decade of Destiny." I believe her. So today I take a moment to celebrate myself, be in gratitude of the Supreme for a perfect heavenly orchestration and I fully release all energies of old that no longer serve me. I open my heart to bring in the new- the abundantly new gifts of love, forgiveness, awareness of my divine purpose, unparalleled courage to act, wealth, health and wholeness in my mind body and spirit. I can only hope that as I move into this new energy and way of being that I truly can represent heaven on earth.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3413325010370257617.post-89497985293916149062010-12-09T09:04:00.000-08:002011-02-09T15:33:20.579-08:00Chapter 2 Verse #2- Never Thought Hip Hop Would Take Us This Far<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeYcwh8yjR5mlB7JrnFH1XinTYFKMc4i1EBKbIDxfYTKtpwyc4cpnzMWUo2p1tdAYWOUF_WndboX5dJ6yx1nJ7m0zLkENzZcScKv5xlBLB-RW2VaVm7jn5VQH5_A5fKmA7R57Anz50dLs/s1600/DSC00855.JPG"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeYcwh8yjR5mlB7JrnFH1XinTYFKMc4i1EBKbIDxfYTKtpwyc4cpnzMWUo2p1tdAYWOUF_WndboX5dJ6yx1nJ7m0zLkENzZcScKv5xlBLB-RW2VaVm7jn5VQH5_A5fKmA7R57Anz50dLs/s320/DSC00855.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5548734965090498882" /></a><br /><br />Today is a historic moment for Hip Hop. Common is the host of the National Tree Lighting Ceremony for the White House this year! Anyone who knows me or for those who don't must know that I've been a fan of Common since his first album- Can I Borrow A Dollar? It's amazing to watch the evolution of people. I'm so grateful to have the privacy to evolve and grow without the scrutiny of the public eye. What a train wreck I would look like to most. <br /><br />2 days ago, I watched President Obama address the news reporters after a significant piece of legislature was signed. It as all about extending the Bush era tax cuts to the wealthy and preventing tax increases for the poor and middle class. The gist of this was about the art of negotiation- compromise in order to reach the long term goal. Many political critics and public opinion criticize the President's actions over these past 2 years he's been in office. He is such a brilliant man and I LOVE the way he verbally slayed the reporter with poise and lightening sharp focus. I've always agreed with the Democratic party that he's had to spend his first 2 years in pure crisis mode. All focus has been directed toward fixing the troubles left by his predecessors and trying to stop the explosion of the country's economic meltdown. In his address, he mentioned this very thing. All of these issues being addressed while dealing with death threats on a daily bases. A statistic ran a couple of months ago that President Obama has received double the death threats of ALL 43 presidents combined in his first year of office!! It seems completely unreal. As I watch humanity's story unfold, it's sometimes difficult to see the beauty in the hearts of mankind. But then in those golden moments when you're fortunate to witness an inspiring speech, or hear a song that moves your soul or see someone give love to a complete stranger in an act of kindness; then hope is rekindled. <br /><br />Oh yeah, Common. Super excited to see the program today! I just wish he could hit a b-boy stance just for the heck of it!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3413325010370257617.post-85441609935083441802010-11-19T00:29:00.000-08:002011-11-16T21:28:22.059-08:00Chapter 2 Verse #1 - 12:22am The Golden Moment<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgsydOQjNR2A9yk36wP0rap5PB4aqq3b4wmWJ2T7ytmJk-nD7bDTxQkuw_KY-0aPLAXRzmBo-Lp-pfR1JMezd8XMmsENoV93I5S20spfqH1OjYrnZNBSuZ_iYHLLG3OMWoRMh6jXWd_Wm0/s1600/design_image_1605242.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5541183968028326674" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgsydOQjNR2A9yk36wP0rap5PB4aqq3b4wmWJ2T7ytmJk-nD7bDTxQkuw_KY-0aPLAXRzmBo-Lp-pfR1JMezd8XMmsENoV93I5S20spfqH1OjYrnZNBSuZ_iYHLLG3OMWoRMh6jXWd_Wm0/s320/design_image_1605242.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 320px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 320px;" /></a><br />
It is 12:22am November 19, 2010. This moment I just turned 40 years old. It's weird to re-read that sentence right now. Funny how birthdays and funerals make life reflection either an awesome experience or a supreme downer moment. I have to say this is an awesome moment. I am so filled with gratitude to be sitting here in my pj's, in my cozy ocean view apartment at 12:22 in the morning, writing. I wasn't sure what to write but I think I've decided to make this a piece of gratitude. First and foremost, I am so very grateful and honored to have the most amazing parents on planet Earth. Mommy and daddy are my heroes. I am grateful that they took the moment to make me. My immediate circle of sister/friends-I can't be more happy thinking back on all of the laughs, the debates, the vacations, births of children, clubbing, movie nights, shopping, crying over boyfriends, celebrating boyfriends- those that turned into husbands:) Jody, Deyna, Nyanza-girl! where do I start about us:), white Nicole, black Nicole, Big sister Sona, Mystic, Angela, Dani, Karen, Michelle, just to name a few but certainly not all- I love so dearly and have shaped my world in so many ways. My sister/best friend from many lifetimes- Rikki: I am so thrilled to have been able to play together again this lifetime with you. You are truly my heart and words can never express how grateful I am for your unconditional love. Thank you for giving me Ryan and Riley. <br />
<br />
And to all the wonderful men that have played such vital roles in my life. My childhood best friend and still my love- Markiest. Your unexpected text message two days ago was a gentle reminder of our bond. You've always been my everything. Thank you for being my friend first- who knew our 5th grade trip to Canada would last us over 30 years. My nephew James II - you are my heart. I couldn't love you more if I had given birth to you myself. Know you're always in my prayers. And now your son James III-its like I get to have you all over again 18 years later. I will never view Michael Jackson videos the same since our time we spent together this past summer. I laugh out loud every time I see a video on TV. Karim, Kwesi, Rod, Kelly, Ern, Tony, Malcolm, Dave, Richie, Thornell, Ali Babu Che- thank you for being my big brothers and for all the love, protection, harassment and jokes. <br />
<br />
Lastly, a love letter of gratitude to me. I still have a hard time seeing myself as a grown up but I am so thankful my spirit guiding me to be the person that I've turned out to be. Like most, I spend a lot of time viewing myself through a heavy critical eye and not enough time singing my own praises. Today is a clean slate- a new day-a promise to myself to love and treat myself with the same kindness that I show to others. I'm grateful to be healthy, safe, beautiful, generous, well fed, and happy to know God. <br />
<br />
"LIVING MY LIFE LIKE IT'S GOLDEN" by Jill Scott<iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dzlDZ4qyfPc_C9mbsN6P__ryfmHWUNVjE_dg1fQi5Ol9Ga6aspt0LPu-UVCDWKDwpl05L49JAejFm4knqDn8A' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' frameborder='0'></iframe>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3413325010370257617.post-84788181921963524262010-10-12T20:40:00.000-07:002010-10-12T21:33:31.397-07:00Chapter 1 Verse #5: Love Is An Action<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQY3SwyFrJoMWxugZKFG6-UCmZhRXnhjWreLQhBNAndAeqnWiyjp1Cs5MMUl41RBqC7o0KR-QE5mewYFwCh2ePeon3FD_HwyECqmbLJav68aquSDDADAAvsXM7AcSgn8XuqS3T_X2WaFk/s1600/Mystic.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQY3SwyFrJoMWxugZKFG6-UCmZhRXnhjWreLQhBNAndAeqnWiyjp1Cs5MMUl41RBqC7o0KR-QE5mewYFwCh2ePeon3FD_HwyECqmbLJav68aquSDDADAAvsXM7AcSgn8XuqS3T_X2WaFk/s320/Mystic.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5527382099166290162" /></a><br />I had the most amazing evening with my sister/friend Mystic. She is an amazing soul and very talented musician. I was please to make her acquaintance in 2000 when my business partner and I signed the music label GoodVibe Recordings. She was their featured solo female artist. She kept company with Slum Village, Martin Luther and a host of other talent as label mates. She is a revolutionary. A lover of humanity with a special affinity for the protection and education of children. A b-girl from Oakland, California, she rhymes and sings through her painful experiences and joys. She is so brave to share her world through her music. She inspires me. She always did and this wonderful day that I got a chance to reconnect with her. It had been over a year since I laid eyes on her and even then that moment was brief backstage at a Hip Hop festival I was working. Originally we had planned to meet at a pizza place near her spot but she decided to cook for me instead and play her new album while we caught up. My favorite movie is the subtitled film "Like Water for Chocolate"- a tale of how feelings infused in the cooking can transcend anything available to the naked eye. Mystic has this same passion. She loves cooking and she does it with such love and dedication. My meal consisted of hand pressed tofu coated with a homemade 5spice seasoning, mixed green salad with lemon ginger dressing topped with a spicy jumbo shrimp topped off with a mango, passion fruit chutney. For dessert, baked figs in a rum sauce and topped with a dab of some fancy sweet cheese that melted instantly on contact. <br /><br />We chatted about everything. Music, life, friends, dating, food and I got a quick schooling session on the latest revolutions taking place over the globe. Out of all the heart-warming and thought-provoking topics we discussed one sentence that made me stop in my tracks was when she said "love is an action." This quote comes on the heels of me talking about recent disappointments from an ex-boyfriend whose actions didn't match his words. Hence, why he's my ex. As I'm participating in this game called human life I've discovered we all want to hear the words "I love you" from our significant other, parents etc. But I realize saying it is only a small fraction of this entity called love. LOVE is an action. When you do "in action" what you "feel" there can be no better demonstration of what alignment is. And while most of us look for someone else to show them love, I think we do ourselves the greatest disservice by looking for that action to come from outside of ourselves. The great sages of our time have always shared that <span style="font-style:italic;">Love</span> is patient, <span style="font-style:italic;">Love</span> is kind, <span style="font-style:italic;">Love</span> is forgiveness. I'm coming to understand that I must be the one to be in alignment with my own actions as demonstration unto myself <span style="font-style:italic;">first</span>. When I can speak and do love for me, I can then hold the vibration to attract like energy in all relationships. <br /><br />As I listened to her amazing new album, I watched her pour so much love into every step in her cooking. It felt like a big hug even before I took one bite. The simplicity of sharing music, food and time is priceless. That was love in action.<br /><br /><span style="font-style:italic;">*Mystic's first recording is titled "Cuts for Luck, Scars for Freedom" - it is a definite must have</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3413325010370257617.post-70973447355283590022010-09-23T13:08:00.000-07:002010-09-23T13:52:12.974-07:00Chapter 1 Verse #4 :Zip- Lining to Freedom<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8MZ4HVa-gUxCsVPuK2OY9VJGFx5E2XZ9XRpMyfhWVUe23y5b7xUmPiC8dOIn525KmQvsjNsAoTPVv84QIYAOJYT5w-JFXrZCQJtqwuux_YCGjDJxgyp-RaWmuN0dhWivRxTRtJrZ4I1s/s1600/IMG_0463.JPG"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8MZ4HVa-gUxCsVPuK2OY9VJGFx5E2XZ9XRpMyfhWVUe23y5b7xUmPiC8dOIn525KmQvsjNsAoTPVv84QIYAOJYT5w-JFXrZCQJtqwuux_YCGjDJxgyp-RaWmuN0dhWivRxTRtJrZ4I1s/s320/IMG_0463.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5520212233886214674" /></a><br /><br />Almost one year ago I turned down the opportunity of a lifetime, as most would classify it. I received a six figure job offer to work in Hawaii being the general manager of a zip lining company. To sweeten the deal, I had a 2500 square foot house to rent from my good friends/brother & sister Dave and Liz. Their home was on a golf course in Kona. I remember sitting contemplating if this was one of God's tests to see if I could remain faithful to my vision I was creating for myself. Sitting here almost a year later I have learned that there are no tests. We create every situation in our life as an awesome gift of free will. I started today's entry from a place of discouragement because I sit here in my cozy apartment in Santa Monica not knowing how I'm going to pay rent for the month. My mind started whirling about how did I get here? What is the purpose of this creation. Regrets from not taking the job in Hawaii are pounding in my brain. For the past 2 hours I've been thinking I could be having the time of my life working in Havi'i, and driving home tonight to my fabulous house right on the water. I realize I was afraid to let go. Maybe somewhere deep within I thought if I could create this surely my heart's vision will manifest. Funny thing is when that opportunity presented itself I had no conscious recollection of creating it. I could not have scripted that effortless scenario even on my most relaxed day. I look back on it and all I can say was that it was powerfully effortless. All I had to do was say yes. In more retrospect, fear was at the core of that decision as I hate to admit it. I was fearful of making a 2 year commitment. Fearful of being lonely in paradise, looking at the dating options were slim to slimmer there. Havi and Kona, are very slow, remote, sleepy towns and I thought my chances for dating or finding a husband would be non-existent. I was also fearful of starting over AGAIN. Fearful of not liking living there and giving up my beach apartment in Santa Monica terrified me. Fearful of not having a social life, having to make new friends at the age of 39. And to boot, fearful of leaving a job that had me completely stressed out and not even being paid to do. Fearful of leaving discomfort out of some idiotic notion that my loyalty would be questioned for not staying in the sinking ship. Fear Fear and Fear. I talked myself right out of what I now see would have been a wonderful opportunity for me to quiet myself and grow. As life would have it, I had never gone zip lining before. Didn't really know what it was but when I learned it was about sliding across the jungle rooftops on a cable wire every part of me was like, "HELL NO!" As part of my interview, I went on the course accompanied by one of the owners. I did all 9 lines. The final line being some 3000 feet above the jungle floor and going about 35 mph over the most gorgeous waterfalls and trees I had ever laid my eyes on. It's amazing how I can trust the two human beings (our guides) with my LIFE on a harness and cable wire in the deep jungle but could not trust God enough for me to take a leap of faith that everything would be alright. <br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2UWBh_CZlStXe-sOIAvF2RAviY6nviY_6c58e-c4YJTNkt6JNn7aMwDNEEJxQB5ZTsoJACdLuAvSPAxZ8aaCYWdUENjwgkONK3MEQHzXVOnITIRnZPlSq3YIAmc86GWtj_umUSXQPD6A/s1600/IMG_0464.JPG"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2UWBh_CZlStXe-sOIAvF2RAviY6nviY_6c58e-c4YJTNkt6JNn7aMwDNEEJxQB5ZTsoJACdLuAvSPAxZ8aaCYWdUENjwgkONK3MEQHzXVOnITIRnZPlSq3YIAmc86GWtj_umUSXQPD6A/s320/IMG_0464.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5520211448520239090" /></a><br />When I turned down the job after agonizing for a couple of weeks, I wrote some poetic email about being inspired to pursue my own dreams and wanting to stay focused on my heart's desire. While that is true, I now believe it was about #10 on the list of reasons why not to take the job. Fear, pride, ego kept me from experiencing what I think would have been the ride of my life. <br />As I sit here now in this moment, I must fully engage my will and that "walk-on-water" faith, silence the negative thoughts and create the reality that I say I want. I can not fail. I've sacrificed enough of me to turn back now.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3413325010370257617.post-64588167208054301402010-09-09T18:21:00.000-07:002010-09-09T19:02:50.694-07:00Chapter 1 Verse 3: Just Like The Water<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQ0TKwV6XDmjYoz7uId9jH9G6SKCJAOK4EZKgzGPVwLZ9wbITlI7gLsPC4j2MonCx6LkkxdMk4jEPCt-1qC_94fAERYTkmKXdARUGtRiAPB8bBsCzuG3DHFR30WWZqGXZ0CozBWEof0Xw/s1600/just+like+the+water.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQ0TKwV6XDmjYoz7uId9jH9G6SKCJAOK4EZKgzGPVwLZ9wbITlI7gLsPC4j2MonCx6LkkxdMk4jEPCt-1qC_94fAERYTkmKXdARUGtRiAPB8bBsCzuG3DHFR30WWZqGXZ0CozBWEof0Xw/s320/just+like+the+water.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5515096623697356098" /></a><br />Today I had to stop and get away. In the middle of my own personal spiral of panic and anxiety, that small still voice told me to drive to Lake Shrine- just to meditate and be one with God in this amazing garden. Just 6 miles up the road in Pacific Palisades, the great Guru and Master, Paramahansa Yogananda created this lush peaceful sanctuary tucked in the hills of Malibu. I'm so glad I listened. Right at the very beginning of the path is a statue of St. Francis followed by the shrine that houses some of the ashes of Mahatma Ghandi. I decided to sit on the bench directly across from this shrine that faces the entire lake. <br /><br />As I called to the Supreme and the angels to get centered and to restore peace in my mind and body, I opened my eyes to discover two turtles floating at the surface of the water with their faces poked out just above the water. It looked as if they were sun bathing while afloat. I watched them both as they gracefully moved all four of their legs to paddle around the water with an occasional coasting in between strokes. I started to imagine what they would be saying to each other. My mind wisked away like a child's imagination. The smaller turtle was trying to rest its head and top part of its body on the slightly larger turtle. The larger turtle immediately swam harder to get away. It was as if he was saying " you're already floating on your own why are you on my back!?" At that moment, I thought of myself as the larger turtle. In a very large lake, beautifully manicured and well stocked with food, it has everything it needs for a very peaceful and abundant life. When I thought of myself as that turtle, I felt a sense of ease come over me. It was like God showed up and gave me the perfect conversation while I was watching the turtles interact. All I had to do was sit still and observe. I thought about the smaller turtle trying to relax on the back of the larger turtle. I compared this to the many individuals I consciously and unconsciously carry around with me. In essence, we all have the ability to float in the lake of the abundance of God if we just do a little paddling on our own. Our needs are taken care of if we can just trust that the lake will provide everything necessary for a happy and abundant life. It's not our job to carry one another when we all have the same God-given abilities to float. I do believe we sometimes have to remind each other that all we have to do is paddle and everything is just fine. The big turtle pushed off and paddled right in front of the smaller turtle. I thought, I too must push off and float and by my example I hope that the others will remember that they can do the same. By the time I was finished saying my prayers the two turtles were joined by a third and all were blissfully floating, with their head poked out towards the sun and gently paddling by me. And to top off the moment, as soon as I said my final decree of gratitude a hawk flew directly above me, soaring gracefully overhead into the sun punctuated by a loud call. It was awesome and surreal.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3413325010370257617.post-25164861467035324992010-08-16T20:37:00.000-07:002010-08-16T21:15:38.981-07:00Chapter 1 Verse 2- The Divine FeminineToday is my grandmother's birthday. If she was still here, she would be about 98 years old. She passed in 2002-she was the last of my grandparents and the matriarch of my mother's family. Nanny was an amazing soul. Funny thing I realized today was that so much of her exists within my mom. Not only from the looks but all of the wonderful traits that I have grown to appreciate and sometimes become irritated by. These past few years, since my grandmother's death have been very trying at best. My mother has endured loss, and heartache suffered by the actions of her own daughter and grandson (my older sister and nephew). <br /><br />One of the traits I have in my personal arsenal is that of giving. Like most women, nurturing is a trait that is unique to the divine feminine energy. The trick is balancing this out pouring of love with boundaries. When is giving too much? When is it necessary to say "no" without guilt? When are you giving too little? These questions come on the dawn of me having discovered my own boundaries and limitations. I become irritated with my mother as she continues to give of herself to both my sister and nephew who for the most part have absolutely no feelings of love in their hearts and especially towards my mother. No matter how much destruction they create in their lives and the lives of my immediate family mother is still there, giving and giving all of herself. I am afraid for her and my fear vacillates between anger and irritation. I see her so sad and worn but still she continues. Martyrdom is the only word that sums it up for me. <br /><br />I've had to learn that giving all of yourself without a healthy balance of receiving leaves you out of balance. Life/energy balance. While I have not always found balance in work and my own personal life, it is constantly at the forefront of my thoughts. I've had to learn to say "no thank you" to people and things that were not in line with my spirit. It's not an on/off switch but I believe the more aware one is of their boundaries, life will be better for all of those involved even if it seems like tough love is leading the way. The Law of Allowance- yet another strong life pill to use on the road to self mastery. I do not like how my sister and nephew use up my mother. But I have to allow my mother her own life lesson with them. My mother is a very strong woman with a huge, generous heart. Yet another fantastic trait of my grandmother and one I have had the good fortune of inheriting. Allowing; that has become a tough practice, something I wish was inherited. In those moments of bliss when I am totally happy, my divine feminine and masculine spirits are cooperating with one another, my boundaries are strong and I am giving and receiving equally, the feeling is like heaven on earth. My challenge is staying in pocket with this alignment and never letting outside circumstances- people, places or low vibration energies to pull me out of bliss. I've yet to master this as an every day occurrence but every day I work to make this just as effortless as I can. So on this day of celebrating the spirit of my grandmother Marie, I send divine feminine energy to all. <br /><br />Sending love and light to my grandmother, my mother and sister always. <br /><br />Love and light to all of youUnknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3413325010370257617.post-86191550473147327332010-08-01T18:21:00.000-07:002010-08-01T19:16:42.945-07:00Genesis Chapter 1 Verse 1: In The Beginning...In the beginning there was The Cold Crush Brothers, Eddie Cheeba and Kool Herc. Then God said, let there be Sugarhill Gang, Funky Four Plus 1 More and Kurtis Blow. Now I feel like I'm supposed to have say something even more clever to write after this stellar opening but honestly its all I got right now. <br /><br />The idea of this blog has come from my slow but steady pursuit of having an outlet of creative expression coupled with exercising my discipline to write. As you can probably tell by now I am a product of the Hip Hop generation- the OG generation. So I should really start this masterpiece with, "In the beginning was mommy and daddy and on November 19, 1970 I was born. Their "us" became "we" and by 1979 I fell in love with Prince and hip hop." My dad is a music enthusiast and it was through his eclectic tastes that I learned of The Eagles, The Beatles, Jimi Hendrix, John Coltrane and more. My mother, never wavering in her music selections, introduced me to the world of Doo Wop, the Motown sound and the blues. But it was my older sister who brought hip hop home in 1978. This is my earliest recollection. <br /><br />Years went by and my love for music grew as I did but as a teenager in the '80's hip hop was my constant. So much so that my first internship in college was working for Luke Records in Miami, FL the summer of 1990. After a small stint in the corporate world, I landed a job in Los Angeles at the then infamous Priority Records-home of the "out-lawed" gangsta rap sound. Sixteen years later and almost 40 years old, I look back on my young adult life as fun, exciting and gratifying. Now at the cross roads of changing my life and career, music has now found a different seat on the Dana bus- no longer driving but still riding. <br /><br />Lauryn Hill recorded one of my favorite songs. I have many, especially when it comes to hip hop but this one is special because it came at a time in my life when I needed it most. Even though I have had the pleasure to work with her recently, she still has no idea how her art encouraged me through a challenging time. "Everything Is Everything" is track 13 on her multi-Grammy winning classic THE MISEDUCATION OF LAURYN HILL. In 1999, I was miserable and burned out about my job at Priority. My very loving relationship with my boyfriend was coming to an end and I was terrified to make decisions to end them both. A friend who was an executive at Vibe Magazine at the time had mailed me a copy of the record. Sitting in my self-imposed prison at the office after hours, this song came on and changed me instantly. I found strength in the words. I thought she wrote the song just for me. On more than one occasion, I really thought that she did. Within 2 months my relationship ended and I had quit my job. Life seemed to be working in my favor again. Even though the storm wasn't over, change had allowed me to find more courage and to breathe a little deeper. Exactly the two things I needed in the following months as the winds of change turned into a hurricane. <span style="font-style:italic;">But that's another story.</span> So whenever I smell change in the air or if I'm smack in the middle of life's upheavals, I put this song on repeat until the quiet returns. <br /><br />So as I've grown as a human being, fundamentally my life has changed. What I used to think was important, how I love and treat myself, how I love and treat others are just a few things that have dramatically taken on a new landscape in my life. My connection to Spirit has profoundly impacted my decisions and what motivates me comes from a much more awake state of being. Thus, giving birth to the name of this blog. This is not designed to be my soapbox for politics, music or religion but a place of honest expression about my life and how I see the world. My goal is that as I write for my own cathartic purpose, that my words, my art, will positively touch the lives of those who find their way to this page. I am hip hop and this blog is my scripture. <br /><br />Love and light to allUnknownnoreply@blogger.com0